Death of a Sister

Daeng's sister died on November 18th but I have not written about this tragity as I don't really have the words. I feel I should write about it so I am just going to try and tell the greaving process of the family here, through picture.

Mon, Daeng's sister was 42 years old. She had gotten quite sich about a year ago but recovered well and went back to her old way of life and stopped taking the medication the doctors had prescribed for her. You can read about that story by clicking on this link: CLICK HERE

Daeng had visited Mon and spent the night with her, November 17th. The next day as Daeng was driving to home in Mae Sai, about 40 kilometer north, Mon stopped breathing. Tun, Daeng's brother told her when she arrived home. She showered, changed clothes and returned to her brother's home in Chiang Rai to help start the furnial arrangements.

For the next three days, friends, neighbors and family would pray and greave for Mon.

To feed the 200-300 friends, neighbors and family for three days takes a lot of food. Daeng bought one days food for everyone, chickens, pork and vegetables, at a cost of around 4,500 THB ($150 USD). Her brother, Jai, bought and buchered a 105 kilogram pig to help feed everyont the other two days.

I drove to Jai's home and visited with the family the next day, November 20th. The family was in pretty good spirits and everyone had arrived except one sister from Bangkok who would arrive by bus that evening. One of Mon's brothers was in Myanmar (Burma) and could not be contacted.

Daeng went shopping to buy a new outfit and shoes for Mon to be buried in. I kidded with Daeng that she could cremate me naked, just like I came into the world. I found it very hard to joke with everyone being so sad.

The christian service was to be the next day at 11:00 AM, then a big meal for everyone. After that Mon would be loaded on a small truck and transported to her resting place in a crypt that was built yesterday.

I did not count the people but we guess there were over 200 people at the service and eat. Our friends, Peter and Nok came to support Daeng and the family.

Folks eat under the tents and at the two homes across the road from Jai's home. All that was left of the pig was the head and ears which would be cooked in soup for the three days of praying following the burial.

After we all eat, I took pictures of the immediate family. From left to right standing: Brother Jai, Brother Poopie, Jai's wife Sang, Mon's Mother Meechu, Daeng, Nephue Kit, Tun's wife Hlong. Below left to right: Brother Tun, Sister La, Neice Nay, Nephue Jok, Sister Sa.

I spelled all the above names the way they sound in English, as best I could. Please remember, I'm a plumber and not very good with English skills.

After I took pictures of the family, Mon was loaded on a small truck and moved to the crypt that was built for her in a christian burial plot at the top of the hill.

There was anyother ceremony.

Then Mon was placed in the crypt and everyone placed flowers on top of her casket.

The casket was then opened and Daeng and Pooie placed the blanket over Mon's head.

The top of the casket was closed. Corrogated metal was placed on top of banboo supports and the crypt was sealed with cement. Daeng and Pooie helped to move the cement from the mixing area to the crypt.


The top was trowel smooth and Pooie wrote Mon's name, dates and a message of love in the cement.

Most of the folks had already walked back. Daeng, Pooie, Sang and Meechu were the last to walk back down the hill.

By the time they arrived back to the house, the tents, tables, chairs and all the cooking equipment had been loaded and were gone.

I helped load a few things and then took four of the visitors from Mae Sai back with me in the car.

I know that I will always remember Mon as will her family. Death is always a tragity!